Jason is now "off" from work till he deploys. Less than 2 weeks now. I just broke into a sweat typing that. Crap. I don't want him to go.

He points out that it means he is one day closer to getting home and like to say "they can't stop time". No, the Air Force can't stop time...yet, I'm sure they are working on it though. Alanna fell off of a side table this morning and was crying. Connor first looked at me to tell me that he did NOT do it, then he comforted Alanna and scolded the table "BAD FURNITURE, BAD,BAD,BAD!"

Yesterday he told me that when Alanna grows up and wants to move away, we have to stop her so that we can keep her forever.

This is the cool part of being a mom. There is a new ice cream flavor that is so yummy: Ben & Jerry's Cake Batter. Think yellow cake with chocolate frosting. It really tastes like yellow cake batter and the chocolate frosting swirl really tastes like chocolate frosting. I love Ben & Jerry's.

When life gets crazy, eat Ben & Jerry's. Now why am I having trouble losing weight?

Labels: Ben and Jerry's

So Connor and I finally get to the bottom of a big thing making him unhappy: he really, really, really hates school. He does not like his teacher, his classmates, the program...nothing about it. Sure, most kids hate school, but not preschool! He told me last night that he missed his old preschool and his buddies there. We are finishing up the school year next month, and he still does not have good friends at school, he misses his friends from Maryland. In Maryland he was the only white child in his class, and I think he liked it that way. Lol. Connor will always be the whitest kid in the room where ever he goes due to his syndrome, but I digress. I talked to Jason last night and reminded me that his mother took him out of preschool because he was not ready. In my family we were not allowed to quit anything. I had to weigh these opposing sides in my mind.

Today we were at a strawberry picking farm with our Mom's Club group and one mother who happened to be at the preschool yesterday told Connor "You had a really bad day yesterday didn't you?" She told me how he was throwing fits because he hates to sing with the group. Wow, so even to the casual unbiased observer how Connor is miserable at the school. It is a nice school!

I asked him what they were singing that he hated so much and he said "songs about God". Fine, we're done. Fuck school.

One: we don't bring him there to reinforce our religious views, they run contrary to the school in some cases.

Two: he is reading at a first grade level and refuses to do work because he is bored to tears.

Three: we thought that preschool would be good for him socially, but he does not like the children there, so it is backfiring.

Four: preschool is not preparing him for school because he is going to be homeschooled next year.

He is so happy that tomorrow is his last day. I am a stick it out person no matter what, so I had to suck it up, but I think this will ease a huge burden in his life. You ever just have too much going on? I am on overload and don't know how to get back my balance. We have had a crazy time in the past few months, now Jason is on a TDY and supposed to be home on Saturday, but he will be flying home out of Dallas on American, so wish us luck.

I was supposed to get my mojo back this past weekend because my best buddy from childhood and I had been planning a trip to New Orleans for months. She said that a friend of hers from home MIGHT need to hang out with us if her plans with an old boyfriend fell through. Boy did they fall through. This girl basically crashed my getaway weekend , made me feel like a third wheel with my own friend and didn't even offer to pay her share of the hotel room. I just feel empty inside about it. Have not talked to my friend since I came home.

Connor is so angry with Daddy not being home that he is destroying anything in his path. He is so out of control that I took away ALL of his toys and books, everything. This is after I threw away many of his Transformers because he has been peeing on the carpet...just because he feels like it. I am waiting to hear back from a children's mental health professional right now.

I am just done. I am so done and things really haven't even started yet, It's only going to get worse when Jason goes to Iraq.

I think it is 5 o'clock somewhere...right now.